"You say that," Lydia says, "but it's easier said than done. She's been gone a while now and being here is the first time I've had time to...and now I've just spent so long pretending to be okay, I'm not actually sure how to grieve," she confesses, looking thoughtful and concerned, somehow, all at once. And Baby can say until his face turns blue that she shouldn't blame herself, but Lydia can only actually stop doing that when she's ready and has gone through the grieving process properly. Therefore, she just nods and leaves it alone, deciding not to argue the point for the sake of arguing. He means well and she appreciates it. That's good enough.

But the latter bit, that makes Lydia smile a little and she nods again. "Yeah, that's kind of the idea. I mean, being here. Part of it is the wish, to pay forward her sacrifice for me the only way I know how. The other part is to live life as fully as I can because she never got to, so now I'm living for two of us."

She pauses and smirks a little in spite of herself. "Which is why I was sort of planning on taking you home tonight and having so, so much sex, but I'm not sure that's going to happen considering this is probably the most depressing date of all time," she replies with a hint of amusement at herself. Hey, admitting it is the first step to accepting it: this isn't a good romantic date and Lydia's failed at something sexual for the first time...ever.

It was bound to happen eventually.

"You want to get out of here? Go for a drive or a walk or whatever?" she offers, instead.