A hum of understanding passes Lydia's lips as she chews another bite. She knows that feeling; that of going in circles. It doesn't feel like forward motion, so it doesn't necessarily feel like motion at all. Lydia's been there, too. What she doesn't expect is for him to turn the conversation so abruptly and the question feels like a sucker punch to the gut.

Lydia realizes suddenly that...nobody has ever asked her that question. Not her mother, not her friends...not even Allison's father. Nobody has ever asked Lydia if she wants to talk about it. So, she might look a little bit confused and taken aback as all of that registers and she swallows her mouthful of food only to pause for what feels like forever.

Wetting her lips, she clears her throat. She'd shared a little bit with Spencer, but he hadn't asked. She'd just shared.

"Nobody's ever asked me that before," she confesses, her lips pursing together in thought. "...she died to save my life. She died because I couldn't defend myself. Or maybe because I wasn't convincing enough warning her to stay away; I don't know. I don't know if I'm ever going to forgive myself for that, but I'd really like to. Someday. You know?"

This is literally the most depressing date of all time. Lydia's pretty sure they're breaking records right now, but maybe she'll at least get a friend out of it.